Shit Sponge #5

“I don’t like all the gay people here. I mean, why do they even want to be on a Disney cruise? Why would they want to be around all of these kids?  I just don’t like it.  It doesn’t feel right.” – family member At that moment, I realized they were numbingly uncomfortable being away […]

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Shit Sponge #3

“Just smile. It is scientifically proven that smiling makes you happier. Maybe that will help your sales!” – Employer If smiling helped I wouldn’t be where I am right now, fuckface. If all of this shit was about feeling ‘happy’ I could easily find a way to cope.   I am told too often how […]

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Shit Sponge #2

“Josh! Turn off that ‘spear chucking’ music!“ – Father I heard this EVERY TIME I put a rap song on when I was younger. Evangelical leadership at its finest. Father of the year? Nope.  Just fucking racist.  

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Shit Sponge #1

“Josh, your marriage to your wife is ‘null and void’ since you denounced god because it was a bond/commitment between all three.” -Brother Thanks bro. We will miss him during sex too. He loved it in the ass.

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